How to control over emotions?
The emotional ups and downs significantly affect your healthy being. You will be perceived by the people around you by the efficiency with which you manage your emotions and don’t let your behavior get overpowered by the wrong emotions. If you let your emotions overpower you after a fellow driver crisscross your car dangerously, this might create an additional chaos and might result into a case of road rage. Expressing your rage might feel you better for the time being, but such behavior is neither appropriate nor adaptive. You could choose to express your anger in other meaningful and constructive ways; for example, by educating the people how to drive in a responsible manner and so on.
Calming yourself down in a state of frustration or rage is not an easy task. But every time you choose the handle of aggression, this might cost upon your relationships, social or professional status and health. Inability to handle the emotions might lead to depression or borderline personality disorders.
Most of us are habituated of seeing the world in the color of glasses we are wearing ourselves. Distortion of perception arises when our emotions wrongly convinces us that something is true without actually examining the facts. This is a learned habit which the individual acquires through his child rearing practice.
The emotional outburst is also a defense which the individual acquires in response to his feeling of inadequacy. He develops a watertight thought pattern involving the policy of all or none thinking, which connotes that a person is either good or bad. There is nothing which lie in between. If someone says lot many good about you, it doesn’t count. But if someone’s intentional or unintentional gesture hurts you, your response is, ‘You knew this all along!’. You absolutely overlook the positive side.
You just get judgmental about someone’s ill perceived behavior without giving him or her the benefit of doubt or the pressure of circumstances.
You have adamant believe in your power of mind reading. You know what others are thinking and it is usually negative. You know how others feel about you and how their feeling affects their action. Overgeneralization, labelling and mislabeling, and jumping to conclusion are your personality traits.
This type of distortion causes a lot of pain to you and your loved ones. Try to look yourself through someone else’s specs. Try to look into the logic behind your assumptions. Challenge your emotional reasoning. Find the another alternative way to look around the situation.
Even if you find your emotional response to be correct, adopt the policy of behavioral pessimism. Do nothing; relax yourself; or do opposite to what you would have done normally and try to remove yourself from that situation. Make a conscious choice rather than an emotional reaction. Try to reframe the situation for a better moment and a better future. Spiritual and religious beliefs could be helpful in finding a meaningful implication of the situation.
Anger is never without a reason, but seldom with a good one.